If you are into something other than what the mainstream herd are into, or have established as “acceptable”, then chances are you’re going to get a lot of questions. Some people are asking because they are just curious and have never heard or considered it before, some actually want to understand it and others, well… They just want to poke holes in your explanation or life choices because their narrow minds can’t cope with the concept of there being multiple perspectives that can all be right!
We all know that swinging is still not mainstream acceptable, and we’re ok with that. Some of us like the shock factor or having our own secret life (well maybe you do, mine isn’t so secret!) Whatever the reason we chose this path, we’re choosing what’s right for us and if we’re honest about it with others, there will always be questions.
Here are the top questions and conversations that I end up in the most. I honestly don’t mind talking about it all, but then duh, that’s my job. But for other people, I certainly know they are sick of the same old questions and having to explain themselves. Maybe you can relate.
Aren’t you afraid they’ll fall in love with someone else and leave you?
This generally stems from their own insecurity colouring their perception of the world, so yes, this is one their own fears they are projecting onto you. They can’t fathom the idea that they could share their partner and they definitely don’t want to gamble for fear they will lose what they have to someone who is more beautiful, sexier and more talented in bed. Us swingers already know the power of giving our partners the freedom to be themselves and to explore sexually. Besides, we’ve already worked out how f#@king hot it is to watch our partner with someone else and the gratitude they feel for us in giving them that experience only bonds us further. Yes, we get it!
Aren’t you afraid of STIs?
About as much as I’m afraid of getting hit by a bus when I walk across the street but I know what to do to minimise the risk (you know, look both ways and such). The media and medical establishment have done their best to scare people into protection or abstinence (it was probably the latter) so while we know to use condoms, hygiene, to get regular testing (and treatment if necessary) and watch out for potential signs of risk with partners, we still know we want to dare to cross that road after looking both ways because all the fun is there! The media and fuss has done its magic in these cases, they are too afraid to try something that *might* increase the risk of contracting an STD and that’s ok for them to choose that. Me and you, clearly, we want to experience EVERYTHINIG life has to offer which includes as many options in the domain of sex! Right?
What about your children? What are you teaching them by being so… easy?
Ahhh, this questions and the variations I get from concerned parents who think I’m parading our human toys around the house in front of our little ones and exposing them to live porn shows… Really? *sigh* They really have no clue because they’ve only seen the overly dramatized version of swinging on TV, so therefore they are highly uneducated, and likely a bit prudish themselves. Hats off to them for being concerned for the welfare of our children, that’s beautiful, but these people are coming from an uneducated perspective so this is an opportunity to educate them. They may or may not want to hear what you have to say about it though, so if they put their fingers in their ears and start yelling “la la la la la” then that’s your cue to stop.
The reason these questions get asked repeatedly is because we dare to share our story with those who are outside the swinging lifestyle. Here’s the thing though, if you are willing to spend time with them, you can often help them get to a place of understanding, more acceptance and less judgment.
I can’t even tell you how many times I’ve been in long conversations where I’ve answered these questions and more, including from people who are devout Christians with some very big judgments about it, only to have them walk away from the discussion saying “thank you!”.
Some will have less judgment and be more accepting (always a good thing have more of those people in the world) and some it will spark an interest in exploring it for themselves, increasing the amount of potential playmates in the mix. Also a good thing!
So kudos to those who speak openly about it all and persevere with the sometimes monotonous questioning, the swinging lifestyle needs more of you.
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Saints & Sinner Ball
The Rabbit Hole
Chateau Vino Adult Venue
Taboo22 Swingers Club
House of Woland
Asian Angels Events
SEQsParties
New Connexions
Coco’s Swingers Party
Radiance Parties
Swingers Couples Club 45+
Hostess Parties
With swingers parties happening every weekend there has never been a better time to get involved in the lifestyle. There are clubs and parties that cater for each and every level of comfort, so get out there and mix it up with some fantastic people who will go out of their way to ensure you have a fantastic time! Click – CONTINUE READING – to see full party listings for Australia
Adult Match Maker has 2.5 million registered members with 25 thousand people logging in each day, making it a great prospect for meeting like-minded people. They also have one of the largest groups of couples on any adult dating website in Australia. There are a wide range of members with tastes, outside of the typical dating website fit. From the looks of things – according to Adult Match Maker’s advanced search tool – you would be hard pressed to find a town across Australia and New Zealand without a wide range of members to choose from.
Adult Match Maker is free to join but there are also plenty of options available within their paid membership to really make the most of the adult dating community they have created. There are 3 tiered membership levels – Silver, Gold & Platinum. Each level opens up a range of features that allow a member to communicate with others on the website – through messages, winks, access to member galleries and chat rooms. We love the fact that they have a free webcam chat room every evening – definitely a good way to actually see who you are chatting to as well as get a feel for their personality before you hook up.
For the sugar daddies, mummies & couples – or people who are happy to pay for other members to contact them – a Postage Paid account allows other members, regardless of their type of membership, to send messages to them for free. We imagine this type of account really opens up opportunities for members seeking casual encounters.
Other features that we really like are their profile verification and membership validation features. From early on, Adult Match Maker listened to member feedback and a key concern among responses was authenticity of member profiles. Their commitment to genuine profiles means that there are numerous features that ensure their membership base is authentic and accessible. To verify a profile, it’s really as simple as taking a picture of yourself with a the verification code and sending it through to their support staff to confirm the profile. We imagine that there are many members who would prefer only to reach out to members who have verified profiles, so this makes great sense!
The member validation feature is particularly useful for those in the swinging scene as it allows members who have met each other to confirm that they actually exist – sweet! They can add a brief message about an interaction they have had with a couple and voilà, one of the best personal testimonial features we’ve seen and a great way of knowing what to expect from a rendezvous.
Adult Match Maker also has Australia’s largest events listings across the swingers and adult dating spectrum. Informative articles from their range of sexologists give you the latest goss about each of the scenes as well as how to make the most of your time on the website. They even have a travel section that features the go-to holiday destinations that are popular in the scene.
So what are you waiting for? If you are new to the swinging scene, an account with Adult Match Maker is going to make the whole process a lot easier to navigate. It’s free to sign up, and with 35,000 members logging in each day, you’ll be swinging in no time. 
WEBSITE
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The Club’s motto – Swing in Style – is a motto that hits the mark! Subtle lighting, cosy corners and luxurious fabrics and fittings set the scene for a truly extravagant experience which invigorates the body and mind. Set over multiple levels with a myriad of themes, each one is tailored for the discerning tastes of the diverse clientèle that visits The Couples Club.
Second Friday of each month
The venue’s owner, John, understands the needs and desires of his guests, and he has honed his vision over many years. John understands that not everyone visits the venue to swing. Guests may come to enjoy the voyeuristic delights, some like to touch and some like to exhibit.
John’s vision for the club is an environment where guests can embrace their sexuality in a playful and friendly setting where personal limitations are respected. It’s a place where fantasies can become reality and often, anything goes.
Swingers in the know have made The Couples Club their no.1 destination for a sexy night out for well over 20 years. For many guests, a visit to The Couples Club is something they look forward to, where new friendships are formed and consummated. The venue’s sole purpose is a club for genuine swinging couples – the club only opens on club nights, offering guests the opportunity to meet other sexy, like-minded couples. There are no compromises in this direction and no doubt one of the main reasons why The Couples Club retains its preference among the swinger’s community as the destination of choice.
The Club plays host to some of Sydney’s stand-out swinger’s nights:
ANGELS & DEMONS
An institution in the swinging scene – Angels & Demons is our favourite night and a must do! Held on the second Friday of each month. Dress in your sexiest attire or release your favourite fetish. Socialise in the velvet lounge and establish the night, before heading to the dance floor to release your inhibitions. Take the next step and indulge in your fantasy – the options are truly only limited by your imagination.
FIRST TIMERS FRIDAY
For those who are new to the scene and looking to take things slowly, this is the night for you. There is no pressure to play, and remember, everyone who visits The Couples Club has had a “first time” swinging experience, so everyone appreciates how important it is for you to feel comfortable.
PURE DECADENCE
Our dress down parties go off! Sydney couples tell us they like to dress up and it seems they like dressing down even more. Just BYO alcohol and BYO partner and we provide a sexy provocative environment to party and play in. Join us for a decadent night of swinging fun on the third Friday of every month.
CASANOVA PARTY
Cultivate pleasure and make it the chief business of your life by making the Casanova party a fixture on your calendar. The Couples Club brings you a unique event for couples and single ladies. Sexy bar and wait staff and a hot male stripper on hand to ensure the atmosphere is conducive to cultivating pleasure.
COUPLES CLUB CONDITIONS
Each event is subject to certain conditions for guests wishing to attend. Most guests agree that adhering to these conditions has made The Couples Club the venue that it is today. The club does not compromise on these and asks all the uphold them.
- Pressuring: Guests must ask before touching – No means No
- No Men Alone: Men must be with Partners at all time downstairs
- Recruiting for parties and collecting phone numbers is not on
WEBSITE
OPENING HOURS
- THURSDAYS: 8:00PM-12:00AM / Selected Single men welcome after 9:30pm
- FRIDAYS: 9:00PM-3:00AM / Welcomes Couples and Single Ladies Only
- SATURDAYS: 9:00PM-3:00AM / Welcomes Couples and Single Ladies Only
- SUNDAYS: 8:00PM-12:00AM / Selected Single men welcome after 9:30pm
LOCATION
226 Commonwealth Street, Surry Hills, New South Wales, 2010
CONTACT
- The Couples Club is a non-licensed venue – BYO only.
As told to: Rachel Kramer Bussel – Elle
Last spring my husband and I were looking for an adults-only vacation to celebrate our tenth anniversary. I came across a “clothing optional lifestyle takeover cruise.” The materials talked about dance parties, clothing-optional areas, and playrooms, including a dungeon. We assumed “lifestyle” meant BDSM. It was only after we’d booked the trip that we realized it meant swingers.
Leading up to the cruise, though, we got to know some of the other couples online and began to change our minds. It started with talk of me being interested in playing with other women and evolved into “Let’s just go for it and enjoy all this cruise has to offer.”
We really didn’t know what to expect when we got there, and were definitely surprised. Some people were completely nude, some just topless, some in tiny outfits, and some fully clothed. We kept our swimsuits on. No one seemed to mind, or even notice, what anyone else was or wasn’t wearing.
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